Recovery in the family is important.  This element I find is necessary for full health from active addiction/alcoholism.

Father Martin, a recovering priest from alcoholism himself, addresses some of the changes in the family.

Since alcoholism is considered a “family disease”, it is important to be able to help the family recover.

He explains these steps in this informational video.

Alanon and Family Recovery

Father Martin eloquently explains how the family has been affected by the alcoholic or addict.  Therefore, the main way this starts is by the alcoholic/addict staying sober/clean.  Consequently, he talks about the primary therapy for families.  This is by working the program of Alanon.

Working this program, therefore, produces family recovery.

As the result, this program follows the 12 steps but in a very different way. Personal health and family well-being are the goals.  Change is very difficult. Many people are suspicious.  The entire process can be difficult.  A spiritual awakening is needed. As a result, this takes a profound change in the way we view the world. Our attitudes must be different.  You will find he discusses the need to eliminate the shame, guilt, and blame which comes with the disease.

Changing the attitudes

Therefore, like any illness, there are certain attitudes and actions that are necessary for recovery.  Although there are many consequences to the disease of alcoholism and addiction,  families and individuals can and do recover.  In order to overcome from the resentments and the memories, an essentially a spiritual experience is necessary.  Forgiveness must come from a power greater than ourselves. First of all, the families get attached to their self-pity and self righteousness.  In order to help, we have to learn separate the person from the disease. This takes much discipline and understanding.. Trying to change another person is one of the signs of the family disease. I have experienced this is one of the main contributors for the family’s codependent symptoms. I have explained this clearly in the blog with Barbara C. in her Al Anon talk.

Changed behavior

Certain behaviors have become “normal” over the years in order to deal with the disease.  Now these same behaviors become not healthy.  This is especially when the alcoholic/addict becomes sober/clean.  Families feel they are to blame.  They feel they have become crazy, and even feeling responsible for the disease. Thinking they are somehow at fault is the most common manifestation.

Knowing this is not true is the hope!! There is much hope in this talk!!!